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Dead baby jokes (ENG)5

34 1

Ārā spīd saulīte, neliels vējš un Ričiņš šodien labākam garastāvoklim, pirms došanās pastaigā, pasērfoja internetā un atrada pāris "Dead baby" (mirušu bērnu) jokus. Tā nu izdomāju padalīties ar Jums dārgie spoki.

Ļauni jau ir, bet autoriem cepums par melno humoru. Un ja vēl ir saulaina 4diena, tad lai iet 2 cepumi emotion

P.s. Tā kā neko pretīgu šeit neredzēsiet, atļāvos pievienot sadaļā Joki.. kā nekā humors i afrikā būs humors.

P.p.s. PIRMS LASI!

Ja kādam kaut reizi ir nākuši pohu stulbumi nākamā dienā ar draugiem, tad tie sapratīs teksta jokus.. tiem kam nav.. lūdzu pārskipojat uzreiz pie video. :)

What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean?
Fucked.

What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs hanging on your wall?
Art.

What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs in a swimming pool?
Bob

What's blue and thrashes about on the floor?
A baby playing in a plastic bag.

How do you make a man pregnant?
Stick a dead baby up his ass!

How many babies does it take to paint a house?
Depends how hard you throw them.

What do you get when you have sex with a pregnant woman? (EVIL ONE)
A baby with a black eye!

How do you get 100 babies into a bucket?
With a blender!

How many dead babies does it take to change a tire?
Two, one to prop up the car and one to replace it incase it explodes.

Why did the baby fall out of the tree?
Because he was dead!

What's blue and bloated and floating in your beer?
A dead baby with fetal alcohol syndrome!

What's the difference between a dead baby and a peanut butter cup?
The dead baby won't stick to the roof of your mouth.

What's red and goes round and round?
A baby in a garbage disposal.

What's more fun than stapling babies to a wall?
Ripping them off again.

Why didn't they crucify baby Jesus?
I don't know why they didn't either.

Why do you unload a truck full of babies with a pitchfork? (pitchfork - dakša)
So you can tell which ones are still alive.

How do you stop a baby from choking?
Take your dick out of its mouth.

What's the difference between a dead baby and my girlfriend?
I don't kiss my girlfriend after sex.

What's present do you get for a dead baby?
A dead puppy.

What's the difference between a baby and a grandmother?
Grandmothers don't die when you fuck them up the ass.

What's worse than a having sex with a dead baby?
Having sex with a dead baby filled with razor blades.

Why do you put a baby in the blender feet first ? (šeit beidzas vis melnais humors.. nu wtf?)
To see the on it face!

What's worse than finding a dead baby on your pillow in the morning?
Realizing you were drunk and made love to it the night before.

What's the difference between a Cadillac and a pile of dead babies?
I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.

What is pink and red and sits in a corner?
A baby chewing on razor blades.

What is green and sits in a corner?
The same baby, six weeks later.

What's red, screams and goes around in circles?
A baby with its foot nailed to the floor.

What goes plop, plop, fizz, fizz?
Twins in an acid bath.

What does a blind, deaf, quadriplegic baby can get for Christmas ? (EVIL ONE)
Cancer.

What's the safest way to play with a baby ?
With a condom.

What's small, and shiny, and blue?
A baby with a plastic baggy over its head.

What's small, and red, and full of holes?
A baby on a bed of nails.

What do you call a baby on a stick?
A Kebabie.

How do you get a baby out of a tree?
You give a Mexican a stick and tell him it's a piñata!

What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs laying on your porch?
Matt.

How do you prevent a baby from exploding in the microwave? (NU WTF?)
Poke holes in it with a coat hanger.

Nu un nobeigumā, nost ar melno humoru un re: Jums amerikāņu klasiskie video joki par bērniem.











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Komentāri 5

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Ja kādam kaut reizi ir nākuši pohu stulbumi nākamā dienā ar draugiem, tad tie sapratīs teksta jokus.. tiem kam nav.. lūdzu pārskipojat uzreiz pie video. :)

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MOAAARRR :3

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atbildot uz shmoid komentāru " What was the first thing that Jesus said when... " jā šitie arī ir niknie! :D

0 0 atbildēt

Es laikam neiebraucu...

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Nebija smiekliigi, vismaz man ne.

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